When we arrived to Barco De Avíla, I was filled with an immense sensation of gratitude. For the first two or three days I was awake, attentive, excited, and grateful. I recognized my energy and my mindset. But what I didn't do was correlate that to any source - or to better phrase it, tie it to anything here that may be affecting my energy.
Before my reiki session with Ana, I have been on this "spiritual journey" exploring the depths of my own energy and consciousness. In India, I felt a very strong connection to myself. A connection that I had to work very hard to feel. Through meditation, writing, and deep reflection. After India I began to wonder if feeling the energy that I'm made up of would always have to be worked for. I believe in energy and the power of the Universe. This is my truth. But before Barco de Avíla, I still had this ounce of doubt... a doubt that was more formed from a desire to have undeniable proof that my beliefs were true.
My Reiki session in Barco de Avíla eliminated that doubt for me. It provided the truth that I sought. I belief in the power of energy of all things, the connection of that power to ourselves and through ourselves with out a single doubt.
I did not expect Reiki to happen so fast. Ana asked me to lay down on the bed and get comfortable, she explained to me she would be saying a little prayer for me before she began and to close my eyes.
I met Ana at Estación Inglesa, an intensive English emersion course for Spanish speakers in Spain. Before we met, I noticed her. Her energy and her poise. Watching her had an immediate affect on my own consciousness. When we first interacted, our verbal communication was minimal as she was there to learn and expand her English, and as part of the program I agreed to not communicate at all in Spanish. But - even with a "language barrier" we connected quickly and deeply. One of the first things she said to me was, "do you meditate?" This immediately spurred our conversation into the law of attraction, the universe, and finally - as she put it, the divine introducing us so that she could perform Reiki on me.
I took two deep breaths and by the time I exhaled the second breath I could feel both of my legs begin to fall apart from one another - in a twitching fashion. I thought to myself that this was me, MYSELF, relaxing for the Reiki session. Within seconds my legs began to tingle and twitch more fiercely. The twitches quickly turned into a vibration. Within less than a few minutes I felt a warmth and a pressure over my forehead. I visualized (without effort - the visualizations during this entire Reiki session simply came to me), I visualized two shadowy forces being pulled a part like curtain over my forehead, exposing the center of my forehead to light. I could feel those curtain like structures slowly pulled from and out of each side of my body. I felt the "curtain" being pulled harder from my right than from the left. At times I felt like my entire body was actually being pulled off the bed on the right hand side.
This is all within the first 120 seconds of Reiki. Ana says to me, "Wow, April, Wow." She says it twice. Before the first "Wow", I could start to feel my entire face become washed over, I felt my jaw completely relax. And without warning before she could get the second wow in my tears are pouring from my closed eyes. I can feel my eye lids twitching ferociously. And before the second wow I had a burst of laughter in the midst of my crying. I had no control over the tears. I had no control over the laughter. I had no control over the vibration of my body. No more than three minutes in, this is when I realized it. This is working. This is magic. This is what I have been searching for. The magic of the universe is flowing through me.
Before the session Ana told me to make an intention or focus my thoughts on something I want to change in my life throughout the session. So I began to focus those thoughts. I could feel energy being pulled out of my body, out of my internal organs, out of my core, my stomach, out of my skin, and lifting into the room around me. My core would vibrate fiercely all the way to my back muscles. The twitches and vibrations would jump down to my thighs and up to my jaw. But it consistently stayed in my abdomen.
There where times where I felt a very strong presence of my father on the left hand side of my head. A question kept circulating to me during the session. "Why do I have so much energy? Why do I have so much energy?" A question that seemed so much more valid and persistent than ever before. "WHY DO I HAVE SO MUCH ENERGY?" Throughout the session when I could feel the points of my head being focused on, I could not control any tears. I could not control a sudden UNCONTROLLABLE urge to laugh. As tears came down my face, my eyes still closed, my body planted on the bed, yet fiercely trembling. My inner voice was speaking.
There was a moment where I could feel my heart racing incredibly fast and I had no control over it. My breathing was intense and heavy and I had no control over it. I could still feel these quantities of energies being pulled away from me, cleaned away from me, stripped away from me. And suddenly I felt a gentle push of energy fill into me. My lungs we being pushed with air like a balloon. All out of my control. And my breath got incredible long, slow, and deep. And as my body inhaled, without being in charge of my own inhale I could feel new energy coming into me. And the thought circulated in my mind, "Today is the beginning of the rest of your life." "The only thing that matters is from here forward."
It felt so incredibly good to let go of control of my body. To release the tears when they decided to be released. To release the laughter when it decided to come. To inhale when Ana and the universe decided to give me energy. The entire session I let the energy flow through me. It was incredible. It was like magic. I've never experienced anything like it. I did not know that this is what could happen. I thought to myself, how comfortable I must be with Ana to allow myself to look and be so vulnerable during this session. And I am so happy to have been that comfortable. Because how are you supposed to allow the energy of the universe to flow through you... if you don't allow the energy of the universe to flow through you?
My body reacted in different ways for fifty minutes of the session. Vibrations, twitches, feeling of pressure, pulling, tingling, visualizing a world of darkness and light during the experience. But the most intense during the entire session was the energy leaving my abdomen. I felt it the entire time. I saw it rising up out of me. I felt like it was all of the toxins I had ever chosen to consume leaving my body. And then I could feel Ana releasing energy into me. Controlling my breath, controlling my lungs, and my body filling up like a balloon with new energy.
When Ana concluded the session she told me to take my time, rest if I need, and then get up. When I moved my fingers for the first time they all popped. When I lifted my arms it felt foreign to move my own body like I had not inhabited it for a very long time. When I moved my arms, my elbows and shoulders popped. When I sat up I felt like I had been traveling through another universe outside of my body. I had to get my bearings straight in my own body before moving. I nearly felt like... It wasn't my body. As I reflect, and as I write this, I feel like my energy felt like my body wasn't it's home. Like the universe was its home. Like it traveling (my energy) was more at home to my energy, than sitting in my own body.
After the session Ana and I sat on the bed to reflect. She said to me, "You have so much energy April. Such beautiful energy."
I told her verbally almost everything I wrote about above. She had goosebumps the entire time we talked. I told her about thoughts I had in my head during the session about how magical this is. About how AMAZING this is that every moment of my life, every country we have been to traveling, every missed bus, every change of plan, led me and Zach to be at Estación Inglesa and Barco de Avíla in THIS moment, and for her to perform Reiki on me. I do not believe that this reaction to Reiki is usual. I believe that it was the universe pulling together two magical energies in a very special environment to bring out realizations in one another. I kept explaining to her how amazed I was, and she kept saying that for her as well, it was incredible, INCREDIBLE! To do Reiki on me. She said that she gave me three gifts during the session. I did not ask what the gifts were. I want my inner light to guide me to them. She said that our session fueled her and made her stronger. She said she sensed I hold in a lot of emotion and stress and she took that away from me so I can start fresh. She told me that she noticed the strongest of my energies coming from my ovaries which is the woman's most creative point. She felt the same energy I felt, though I thought it was my abdomen. She explained that it as my creativity wanting to be released.
I've felt kind of in a daze the rest of the afternoon. I've almost cried again multiple times.